You did make me laugh with "I had to tap dance home in my cleats and looked like a right prick!"
And yes you deffo need to find somewhere else to ride other than Epping otherwise you've wasted your money on an Enduro bike!!!
If you've a car then get yourself an invite onto one of the Danbury/Chelmsford rides or make your way to Warley/Brentwood one Sunday morning and join in with that crew.
And to the Epping riders - I'm not disrespecting the place, I know it's hard going as speed and blah, blah, blah...
There are shed loads of rides & groups mate, just jump in & good luck!
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